Day Ten

Today is day ten of the social media fast. I haven't looked at Instagram or Facebook in the past ten days. I've used Facebook messenger, and tonight I sent someone a message on Instagram because that's my only contact for that person, but I haven't looked at the sites.

Last week, I felt the absence keenly. Ken left Sunday night to travel to Las Vegas for the week. He and his company went to a conference and he didn't come home until Friday. I missed him terribly, and I felt the absence of my Facebook world. I felt the absence of the voices of friends. I felt very lonely. I spent the first few days thinking about my day in terms of Facebook status updates. I even wrote down a few funny things the girls said to share after the fast was over.

I'm not sure if my not remembering to miss Facebook happened because Ken came home, or it just coincided with it being a few days and I was just out of the habit.

President Nelson said this in General Conference: First, I invite you to participate in a 10-day fast from social media and from any other media that bring negative and impure thoughts to your mind. Pray to know which influences to remove during your fast. The effect of your 10-day fast may surprise you. What do you notice after taking a break from perspectives of the world that have been wounding your spirit? Is there a change in where you now want to spend your time and energy? Have any of your priorities shifted—even just a little? I urge you to record and follow through with each impression.

I'm not exactly sure what I'm feeling. I'm really not. Oddly enough I feel afraid of the fast ending. I feel afraid to go back on Facebook. I don't think I'm ready to quit the place altogether. There are so many friends and family I keep in touch with. I love seeing pictures, hearing peoples news. But what is it doing for me. How have I felt these past ten days?

The one thought that came was that maybe I'll just look at Facebook on the weekend. I know I have wasted a lot of time on Facebook - so much time. I'm not exactly sure what I've accomplished in the past ten days without Facebook. My house is still a mess, I have projects that aren't done, blog posts that aren't written, marking and school work to do. I don't know if I've noticed any extra time the past ten days. And maybe that's because I'm still looking at my phone. I've still played a few puzzle games - but one or two in a day, and I've watched a few funny videos on YouTube, maybe one a day. I don't sit and watch tv, I don't really sit very often. The girls take so much time. What little housework I have time to do, takes so much time. Commuting takes time, my work takes time. That is my constant lament, the lack of time. So how then do I justify time on Facebook? It is entertainment. It is something I enjoy. It is something that is sometimes uplifting. I do sometimes get sucked into reading posts that just aren't important and waste my time and sometimes are depressing. But I know I like to share, and I know that I entertain my friends and family. I know there is an important connection there. I just know that I need to do better to be in control of it and not it in control of me.

I think the last ten days have been more peaceful. I suppose the Book of Mormon reading challenge given in the same talk by President Nelson would have something to do with that!

I'm grateful for a living prophet. I'm grateful for the spirit of revelation, for the guiding influence of the Holy Ghost - for the peace and reassurance of the comforter. I have enjoyed the break from Facebook. It's been good to step back